it seems like a lifetime ago

It seems like a lifetime ago that I laid in the room in my hospital bed crying as they were prepping me for my c-section, shaking as i texted "Prepping for c-section" to a few important people. Crying, shaking and scared of the unknown future of my daughter i laid there praying to McKenzie to please watch over her and keep her safe. Make sure that she got here safe because mommy and daddy needed her.
Crying as I laid in my recovery bed post c-section, begging for my husband (and they told me they couldn't find him) because I knew Avery was born alive but didn't know what kind of shape she was in. Crying as I told my husband I was sorry that my body had once again failed our family. Crying as we got the news that she was alive and doing well, just tiny.
It seems like such a lifetime ago that i stood there over my tiny little girl touching her hand, tears streaming down my face telling her how much i love and need her, wanting her to always know.
I never want to go back to that place and I am so thankful for everyday we have with her.