The birth of my two preemies

If this is your first time here, please read McKenzie's and Avery's birth stories!

McKenzie's birth story

Avery's birth story

Friday, May 29, 2009

Am i crazy?

i think the answer to that may be yes. I honest to god feel like i am going crazy. I feel like the whole world is spinning one direction and i am spinning the other. I feel like some days i dont want to wake up. Scratch that somedays i pray that i wont wake up, so that i can wake up with McKenzie, i have a daughter and a husband to take care of, how irrational is that?!?! But it happens. Many of my days and nights are spent crying myself in and out of conciousness. I am lucky if i even remember what day of the week it is, i no longer have the concept of time, day is night and night is day. Am i going crazy or have i already gone crazy? I feel like i dont have a rational thought left in my head. Somedays i pray to wake up and be pregnant again, and somedays i pray to wake up and be all alone. I feel like i am living under a dark cloud. I swear i have gone crazy.

1 comment:

Joie said...

I just want you to know that I'm reading. ((HUGS))