The birth of my two preemies

If this is your first time here, please read McKenzie's and Avery's birth stories!

McKenzie's birth story

Avery's birth story

Saturday, June 6, 2009

id give anything to be pregnant again

but not just any pregnancy, pregnant with McKenzie again. I should be 36wks 2days pregnant. I should be having my little girl in 2wks 2days, instead of spending all day sitting outside selling her clothes at a yard sale. I would give anything to be able to take those words back that i now regret saying so much. "I am so done being pregnant, i want it to be over". I have never regretted anything more in my life than uttering those words. this is now how i pictured my life at 23, this is not how i pictured my family life to be like at all.

2 comments:

livbeme said...

This brought tears to me eyes. I know I have said this numerous times,out situations are different.But I felt the sameway. When i was pregnant I got so fustrated with the getting sick, the moodswings,the constent eating,the bloodwork I had to do,the numerous doctors appointments due to my first loss. that i kept saying i wish i wasnt pregnant anymore.that i didnt wanna be anymore.then I lost my baby.my baby didnt hold on,i felt it was my fault cause i said that,i felt my baby felt how i was feeling and just didnt wanna fight.i cried for days on end. but everyone kept telling me it wasnt my fault.but i still feel that way..till this day I feel that way. I would give anything to still be pregnant I look at my calendar and its a constent reminder of how far along I would be..22weeks. its crushing. i would give anything to be pregnant again..

Anonymous said...

OMG girl I cried. There are no words that can strengthen your heart, only time will heal it on your own time. There will ALWAYS be a place in your heart for McKenzie. Somewhere in all of our hearts there will be a place for her. I didn't get to see her, but my God she's beautiful always will be, Laura. Like you said, it isn't your fault. Keep your head up and you are doing an awesome job, sometimes all you have to do to get through these things are put on a fake smile and go about your daily life, so you don't have to explain yourself to others, I don't know if that makes any sense.